


I know

by iisintrovert



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Cute, Eventual Smut, Fluff and Smut, Kissing, M/M, Nonbinary Hanji, Yaoi, always queer hanji, dorky Levi, ereri, im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-01
Updated: 2015-10-01
Packaged: 2018-04-24 08:47:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,016
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4912957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iisintrovert/pseuds/iisintrovert
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi is having a rough night, trying to exhaust himself into no-longer remembering anything that might break down his carefully constructed demeanor. Will a certain ocean-eyed cadet be able to help him?</p>
            </blockquote>





	I know

Eighty-seven, eighty-eight, eighty-nine...  
His mother, his childhood, the pain of never reaching the sunlight, even after he tried his hardest.  
Ninety-one, ninety-two, ninety-three...  
The anxiety, the humiliation. He had been forced into a death contract with the only reward being his freedom, and even then it was limited.  
One hundred, one hundred-one, one hundred-two...  
Farlan, Isabella...  
Levi felt his muscles spasm under his work-out tank-top as he collapsed onto his stomach. His arms fell to his sides. The only noise in the small office came from his labored breathing.  
One hundred and two push ups before giving up, he thought, with what could have once been the ghost of a smile. I wonder if that counts as some kind of record.  
It didn't matter. The exercise did nothing for him but allow him to work away his anger. That seemed to be the only emotion he felt these days, of course. Anger, and crushing helplessness. It was like he had been stuck in a dark pit, with no one to help him climb up.  
Except...Levi felt a pang in his chest and a flash of green played across the inside of his eyelids. No, he thought. Don't think about him.  
He turned over onto his back and stared up at the dusty ceiling. It was the only part of his office that he didn't clean compulsively. How could he? He could be as tall as Erwin and still not be able to reach the wooden support beams that held the castle together.  
After a few moments, Levi felt his chest start to rise and fall at a healthy rhythm and no longer felt short of breath. It was nice, he decided. The post-exhaustion euphoria. It allowed him to feel something that wasn't just anger with sadness mixed in to fill the guilt ridden cracks.  
Maybe if I just lay here, no one will find me. I can sleep without the fear of nightmares. I might even dream of them.  
Of course, that was when the door opened.  
“Shit.” Levi groaned, sitting up. He was only wearing boxers and a muscle shirt, it would be slightly humiliating if someone found him laying in his own sweat.  
“Oh! Captain, I'm so – I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to barge in.”  
Levi opened his eyes. That voice...that was what he was missing. “No, it's alright Jeager. What is it.”  
He opened his eyes to see the blushing boy standing in his doorway, averting his eyes. A pad of paper and a pen were in his hands.  
“It's just,” he sighed, and looked down at Levi with those perfect green eyes. “Commander Erwin wanted me to see if you would be directing technique training tonight, considering it is your specialty. Hanji says they can do it, but Erwin would prefer you take the midnight class. He wants to start training us to use the maneuvering gear in the dark, so we can do more nighttime hunts.” the boy rambled.  
Levi pulled the bottom of his shirt up to wipe the sweat off his face, and heard Eren gulp loudly. He almost smirked.  
Sighing, he let his head fall back down to the floor. “Tell shitty-brows I'll do it, but he owes me one. I haven't had a decent nights sleep in days.”  
Even with his eyes closed, he could imagine Eren nodding his head vigorously, and getting ready to leave the room.  
“Don't go just yet,” Levi called out, and opened his tired eyes halfway. “I need you for a moment.”  
Eren paused in his motion, halfway turned around with one hand on the door. He peered back at Levi and walked towards him awkwardly.  
“What do you need help with?” His free hand was knotted in the back of his hair, rubbing his neck uncomfortably.  
He pointed at his socks. “Sit on my feet.”  
“Excuse me?”  
Levi kept a straight face and bent his legs until he was in sit-up position. “You heard me. I'm not done working out yet, and Erwin doesn't need his answer immediately. Sit on my feet.”  
Eren stood still for a moment, his mouth agape, before crouching down on his knees. He placed his notepad on the ground by Levi's feet, and pressed the heels of his hands over the socks on Levi's tiny feet. His hands completely covered them.  
Levi started to push up and down off the ground, curling towards Eren. He began to count again. This time, he was barely paying attention to the numbers.  
Six, seven, eight...

Levi's warm breath tickled Eren's cheekbones every time he lifted himself up. It was all the poor boy could do not to squeal. He just had to gulp down the small noises in his throat, and focus on something else. Not the breath on his face (that smelled minty and endearing), not the way his wet hair fell in front of his face (he had nice hair), not the way his flat stomach curved upward perfectly (his abbs were better then Mikasa's, and that was saying something), the way his own arms brushed against the hem of Levi's underwear, anything but that. He just had to...look forward.  
Levi's eyes were open. And he wasn't breaking eye contact. Eren gulped down a squeal.

Twenty-three, twenty-three, twenty-five...  
Little brat couldn't stop staring. Levi knew it, of course, he wasn't blind. It was pretty obvious Eren was a little bit obsessed. At the thought, another familiar pang brought itself up in his chest. You're a little bit obsessed yourself.  
He stopped counting and focused instead on Eren. He was staring intently back at him, swallowing hard every few seconds, completely silent.  
Oh, that wont do.  
Levi pulled himself up harder, ignoring the soreness on his stomach. He made his face get closer to Eren's each time, until their noses were grazing against each other.  
Eren made a little pleased noise in the back of his throat, combined with the terrified look on his face. Levi had to change that.  
His little member of the scout regiment had been on his mind for a while now, and Levi was sure he had been on Eren's. There was something...endearing about him, something that made him want to melt. Levi hadn't felt like he could smile in front of anyone since...well, since them.  
No, I don't want to think about that. I want to think about him.  
He kept pressing up off the ground, his nose brushing against Eren's each time he pulled himself up. He could tell from the redness on his cheeks how much it was effecting him.  
His stomach had been protesting since number sixty-seven. Have...to keep...going...  
“Sir,” Eren squealed.  
Levi couldn't do it anymore. He had already been exhausted before he started, and the stupid kid was sitting right in front of him, his arms brushing against his legs every couple of seconds and...  
Levi sighed.  
Fuck it.  
He paused mid-sit up, right at the moment his nose touched Eren's.  
“Um, sir? Can I – umph!”  
Levi reached up, grabbed Eren by the sides of his face, and pulled him down to his own. His words were silenced on his lips.  
Eren made another pleased, needy noise in the back of his throat. Levi grinned against his lips. He tilted his head to give him better access, and moved his mouth against Eren's tortuously slow. Levi allowed his lips to open a fraction of an inch before he closed them tightly over Eren's again. He heard the other boy moan quietly in response.  
Levi was beginning to realize that they were much too far apart. Eren hadn't moved a muscle, and that certainly wouldn't do. He wanted the boy responding and playing along until he was a moaning puddle. He quickly moved his hands from the sides of Eren's face, trailing his thumbs along his pulse points until one was tangled in his hair and the other was wrapped around his back, pulling him flush against his sweaty chest. Eren immediately grabbed on desperately, eager for some sort of contact. His hands fisted in the back of Levi's tank-top. Eren sighed into Levi's lips.  
Levi cradled the kneeling boy with his bent knees and tucked his ankles around until his entire body was hugging him closer. Their torsos aligned neatly, perfectly.  
He's perfect, Levi thought. He left soft, lingering kisses along the boy's slim jawline. He trailed down ward for more. The tan jacket of the military uniform was pushed off his body roughly, allowing Levi access to suck, bite, and leave open-mouthed kisses at the curve of Eren's neck. The younger boy ran his hands through the older's dark hair in response. Levi bit down harder on his collarbone, and Eren positively whimpered. Mine, Levi thought, as he sucked on the spot until an obvious red mark appeared. He's going to be mine.  
“Levi...” Eren choked out, almost at a whisper.  
Returning to his mouth, Levi let his tongue push gently into Eren's, muffling the quiet moans this simple action had enticed from his body. Eren repeated the action immediately. That was how they sat for what might have been minutes. To Levi, it felt as though hours, days could have passed by before he would have had any need to pull away. Eren always seemed to do that to me, he marveled. His quiet innocence and trust took Levi's breath away on a daily basis. He couldn't do anything wrong. Eren could murder a puppy and throw it at an old lady, and Levi's first response would be to help him get away before anyone saw.  
And, he was an excellent kisser.  
Levi pushed himself forward until he and Eren were braced against the closest brick wall, and planted his hands firmly on Eren's slim hips. The taller boy was already lifting the thin tank-top up, and over Levi's head.  
Levi left a quick bite on Eren's lower lip before pulling his head away to remove the sweat-soaked cloth. Eren was already beginning to trace the corded muscles of the older's back with hesitant fingers. Levi lifted his head just slightly, tucking his face into the crook of the younger boy's shoulder.  
“I think I love you.” he whispered.  
“Levi? I couldn't hear you.” Eren asked, with a note of concern in his voice.  
He pulled his face away to look at the worried face in front of him. He had grown accustomed to seeing that face. With many different expressions, sure, but still that face. That look in his eyes. Levi knew he had gotten much too used to it, and he knew that if anything were to happen to this person, he wouldn't be able to continue.  
For some reason, Levi felt the need to tell him that.  
He pulled Eren's head closer and kissed just under his ear. “I love you,” he whispered. It was like he was trying to deposit the words directly there, as to make sure they wouldn't get lost along the way.  
Eren looked as though he didn't know how to respond. No, scratch that, he looked as though he knew exactly how to respond. He knew what he wanted to say, but he didn't know how to make the words come out. They were words that hadn't crossed his lips in such a long time.  
Levi understood. It was hard to say things like that. “You don't have to,” He muttered, pressing his lips against Eren's just light enough to ensure Eren could hear (and taste) what he was saying. “I already know.”

Levi opened his eyes. It had been a long time since a dream like that had passed in front of his eyes. The dreams that he had been having recently...well, most of them did make him cry. But not like this one. They hadn't been anything like this one.  
He reached to his throat, where the strung-up key has rested for just over a month. Levi clutched it with a shaking fist. “I already know.” he whispered.  
A tear traced its way down his cheek.

**Author's Note:**

> IM SO SORRY


End file.
